It’s the happiest time of the year! … Well for some of us, the holiday season, also known as cuffing season (aptly named for the relationships that are formed due to the change in weather), can bring any unattached girl to tear her hair out. Many strong, independent, educated Black women, myself included, have fallen prey to the draw of the romantic and sappy holiday movie coupled with the consistent frustrating studies and statistics recently thrown in her face regarding her inability to get married.

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Over the past few years, the media as well as several studies have victimized the Black woman, portraying her as incapable and unworthy of marriage. According to a 2009 U.S. Census Bureau report, issued in May of this year, 70.5 percent of African American women between the ages of 25-29 have never married compared to 41.6 percent of their White counterparts. Also earlier this year, Psychology Today (which was quickly taken down) published a completely offensive study by Satoshi Kanazawa stating Black women are “least attractive” among all women. Between these disturbing statistics and allegations, and the constant need to be cuddled up during the cold, there’s no wonder a single Black girl can’t catch a break and is single during the holidays!

While it is cuffing season, and you probably want to strangle your neighbor and her new “boo”, there truly are amazing benefits to being single during the holidays.

Save that money!

Think about all of the money and anxiety you’ll be saving yourself this holiday season. Instead of focusing on getting him the “perfect” gift, use this time to spend your hard earned money on yourself!

Kiss cuties under the mistletoe!

The ultimate benefit to being single during the holidays, you can have more fun at all of the parties you’ll be attending. And who knows, maybe all that kissing will lead you to your prince charming. Ok corny I know, but I blame it on all of the holiday romance movies I saw this past weekend.


Many women I know dread gaining those extra pounds during the holiday season. Forget about that pudge around your stomach, that only seems to go away when you’re lying down, and rejoice in the curves God blessed you with.

Something New!

Take this time to explore new things, and date outside your race. Maybe it’s time to give “Brad” in your office an equal opportunity and spice up his life with some pepper (Ok, ok I’ll stop while I’m ahead).

Forget the negativity and ignore the constant reminders of your singledom this holiday season. Take the time to be selfish and remember that you’re alone because you just haven’t met that one man who realizes that you’re a queen!

By @CamillaCarmel

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